My hiking boots are splotched with antique-white from summer painting and my brown shoes have stomped fish-heads in Seville (seriously, fish heads in the street, gross). I spend whole evenings in silence doing cross-word puzzles and playing scrabble with my room-mates, and still have the gall to think I'm hip. I sing in the shower, hold doors for strangers, and take the utmost care to use my adverbs properly. Casual friends gift me with automobiles and computers. Beggars seem to know that I am good for a dollar. I've been told I "can light up a room", but I cannot see in the dark. I am averse to phone calls -- placing orders for even pizza delivery with great difficulty. I would much rather make a fool of myself in person. I'm a more charming fool in person.
